By Daniel Caerwyn

About Awkward Saints

Investigating the architecture of "Missional Discipleship" systems.

Awkward Saints is a project dedicated to analysing the mechanics of spiritual influence. We exist to help the Church distinguish between the discipleship of love and the discipleship of control.

While much is written about theology, fewer resources exist that examine the sociology and behavioural psychology operating within our churches. We investigate systems that appear healthy from the outside—where the coffee is brewed and the services continue—yet operate internally through mechanisms of disconnection, dependency, and engineered compliance.

Our primary focus is the system often referred to as "Breenism" (associated with Mike Breen, 3DM, and the Order of Mission), though our work applies to any high-control group that trades access for utility.

Our Mission

High-control systems rarely announce themselves. They are built methodically using recognisable tools: invitation-only access, private vocabularies, and social filtering.

Our mission is to make these invisible mechanics visible. By providing a vocabulary to name these dynamics—from "Compliance Gates" to "Discernment Hijacking"—we aim to equip survivors to understand their experiences and leaders to dismantle unsafe structures.

The Purpose Behind the Work

This project exists to protect faith.

For a long time, the very word "discipleship" filled us with dread. It required an intentional discipline just to hear the word without flinching. We distinguish between two conflicting types of discipleship:

  • The Discipleship of Love: Where a leader points through themselves to Jesus. Where a disciple can be confused, misaligned, and lacking in "utility," yet still be deeply loved.
  • The Discipleship of Shortcuts: Where disciples are selected based on their "capital" or influence. Where the leader is the model to be imitated, and access is a reward for utility. This system offers neat answers to complex questions, distilling behavioural psychology into frameworks designed for control.

We write because we need distinct language for these two opposing realities.

The Project

Awkward Saints consists of three pillars of work:

  • Investigations: Deep-dive reporting into specific leaders and organisations, documenting the history and impact of coercive control.
  • The Toolkit: Practical resources, glossaries, and frameworks designed to help individuals diagnose their environment and navigate recovery.
  • Analysis: Video essays and articles that examine the meta-structures of church growth, such as the "Disconnection Machine" and the misuse of biological metaphors like "grafting".

About the Author

Daniel Caerwyn is a researcher, writer, and Christian.

He writes pseudonymously to maintain a strict focus on systemic issues, protecting the integrity of the work in a landscape where the cost of speaking out is high.

This work is personal. The systems we analyse have taken root in the lives of people we care about. We write with the conviction that if this project helps even a single person make sense of their experience—to hear a Christian voice say, "this was wrong"—then a lifetime spent doing this work will be a lifetime well spent.

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Comments

Thank you for joining the conversation. This space is intended to be a place for support, clarification, and shared understanding for those who have been impacted by high-control spiritual environments. To help create a safe and constructive dialogue, please consider the following guidelines:

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Daniel Caerwyn avatar

About Daniel Caerwyn

Daniel Caerwyn is a pseudonym – an investigative writer exploring systemic causes of organisational dysfunction. He writes with commitment to the Church and compassion for those within it.

Expertise:

Spiritual Abuse High-Control Systems Leadership Dynamics Safeguarding Ecclesial Reform